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Archive for March, 2012

Anyone who knows me, knows that I am a sarcastic person. I have even been granted the title of a ‘sarcasshole‘ from time to time.

Sarcasm is not telling someone they suck (that would be honesty). Having a comeback for everything said to you is also not sarcasm. For those who are new to earth would like a dose of wiki,

Sarcasm is defined as, “A cutting, often ironic, remark intended to wound. It is a form of wit that is marked by the use of sarcastic language and is intended to make its victim the butt of contempt or ridicule.” 

See, right off the bat this definition bothers me. Why? Because it makes anyone who uses sarcasm out to be complete bitch (or jerk) and that really just is not the case (at least with me)  First off, sarcasm has to be used correctly. Secondly, I use sarcasm unknowingly sometimes. If it wasn’t for the BF (who has so nicely pointed it out here and there), I wouldn’t even know I was so freaking sarcastic to begin with. It was one of these “instances” of sarcasm that got me thinking… Is sarcasm a good or bad thing? My answer: Both. To back up my claim, I wanted to write a list of some of the pro’s and con’s of sarcasm. Just to make sure I am not always being a shithead

 

*Disclaimer: this is only my personal on  my own use of sarcasm – There is a good chance I have no idea what I am talking about*

Pros of Using Sarcasm Correctly:

  • Can be ‘witty, intelligent, and cool’
  • It can be humorous
  • You have to actually have half a brain to use sarcasm
  • You have to be able to think and react quickly
  • If you are surrounded by smart people, people will get your jokes
  • When turned inwardly, sarcasm can make another feel better about being a tool
  • Sarcasm keeps me sane

Cons of Sarcasm (or sarcasm used incorrectly):

  • Can be used to make fun of a person and hurt his or her feelings
  • Can make someone the butt of a joke (sometimes unknowingly)
  • Sarcasm can make a situation worse
  • If you are surrounded by idiots, no one will get your jokes
  • It can be too harsh
  • Can get you in trouble
  • If used wrong can be unwitty, unintelligent, and lame.

– – – – –

-Amy the Sarcasshole

Q. What is your opinion on sarcasm? Any pros or cons you would like to add to the list?

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Dude. WTF

Doesn’t it always seem like it is the ‘little’ things in life that totally urk you – not a day ruiner but more like a WTF moment maker…   I know it is like that for me, so I figured I would focus on some of the things that have left me a bit perplexed as of late:

 

1) INTERNET/TEXT SHORTHAND:

The first on my list is coincidentally in regards to those three letters above: WTF. Now, it is not the actual words that causes me to lose my mind because ask anyone who knows me I have the mouth like a truck driver, it is the whole internet and texting craze with using letters as shorthand for expressions etc. It is getting a little lot out of hand. Some examples that I have seen on the internet (ala Facebook, obviously) and via text:

WTF: What the F**K               SMH: Shake My Head          LML:Love My Life         FML: F**K my life              ATM: At the moment             IMU: I Miss You                    STFU: Shut the F up      LOL: Laughing out loud

Now, I could probably go on and on with this list and still not cover all of the annoying shorthand out there. And, don’t get me wrong, I am all for saving a bit of time or a few chracters in your text message but this is getting out of hand.

2) Recent Restaurant Trends:

I love food. I love going out to eat with my BF to a resturant and just get some “me and him time” over a drink and a good meal. Lately, our experiences going out to eat have been sub-par at best…

I am in no way a picky diner. I am pretty chill and usually do not have any crazy demands – the only exception is that I am a plain kind of person. Usually if I order something I do have make a change or two to it,by omitting something I don’t like (like tomatoes or onions – blech) One thing that I have noticed lately more and more is that servers aren’t writing orders down, and instead just thinking they can memorize it. Now, if the waitstaff could actually do this and get my order right, things would be fine and dandy…but they suck; so they can’t. Therefore, almost every single time I go out to eat something with our order isn’t correct. Then, when we have to send our item back, our super-waitress who was too cool to write down our correct order in the first place, gets snippy with me. Really?

                                              

Other trends that are just plain annoying in the restaurant business:                                                                                               *Having to play tag with my waiter just to get a glass of ice water  *Having to pay for a bread basket  = LAME.

3) REALITY TV

Yup. I am going to go there. Briefly, of course because I am just as big a fan of some reality shows as the next American however I feel like the content of some of these shows is really pushing the “someone actually gives a shit?” limit. I think it is bad enough that the Jersey Shore Cast makes more money for one season than most hardworking Americans yearly, but to each their own and clearly people are watching. But when I turn on the tv and see a reality show that follows some Rock/Flavor/Daisy/Real Chance of Love show (I mean, seriously, 4 different version of the same show?!?!) I can’t but help but roll my eyes. Of course, not all reality shows are created equally…

                                                                       

Some are just dumber than others.

———

Q. Anything leaving you saying WTF lately?

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So, I wasn’t sure what I was going to write about today but had the urge to write. Good thing I had to go food shopping and it sparked my post for today: shit that annoys me at the grocery store. I am sure some of you sympathize.

1) Aisle Blockers

We all have seen these gems at the grocery store: Talking on their cell phones, reading box labels, or looking for an item way down the aisle all while completely blocking aisle. These people drive me crazy, and I have resisted the urge many times to move them out of the way myself.

2) Terrifying Kids

Now, not being a “kid person” may influence my annoyance about this one but there is nothing worse than being near a kid in the grocery store who is having a complete meltdown. Of course, I get that being a parent is hard work but I guess feel that if you can hear a kid screaming because they can’t have chips throughout the whole store and the temper tantrum lasts more than like, 8 minutes, maybe a parent should take their child outside.

3) Express Lane Abusers

I will admit, that I have gone through the ’12 items or less’ lane with maybe 2 extra before. My number 3 is not those people. Number 3 is about the people that have a grocery cart overflowing with groceries. These people know they have a lot more than 12 items, but just do not care. This just means those of us with a gallon of milk to purchase are shit out of luck.

4) Oops, I forgot…

Have you ever been in the line at the grocery store, your items half on the conveyor belt when the person proclaims, “oh I just have to run and get ___ I’ll be right back!” Yea, this is asinine. If someone forgets something, they shouldn’t be able to hold up the line for 20 minutes for 20 minutes while they go and search for whatever they want.

5) Checking Out.

I feel like every time I go grocery shopping the store has like 1 cashier open. The rest of the ‘open’ lines are self-checkout. Now, in theory self-checkout lines would be a brilliant and time consuming part of shopping … if they actually worked! I am pretty sure 98% of the times I have used a self-checkout machine it has stopped working and turned into a huge fiasco.

I am sure myself and everyone else out there could come up with a few more to add to this list. This list is what I encountered just today while shopping! There is also the customer who holds the line up by sitting there and having a full blown conversation with the cashier. Or what about the coupon-crazy lady? I am all for the extreme-coupon craze and can appreciate a good savings – but if someone is going to spend 30 minutes organizing and using their coupons; then maybe they need to open a separate line. And of course, I forgot to mentions the gems that decide to wait until their entire order is bagged to deem it necessary to ‘put a couple things back’…

Am I forgetting anything? What annoys you most about food shopping?

-A

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