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Archive for February, 2012

About five years ago, when you mentioned the word Facebook to my Grandmother she probably would have asked me where the rash was and to put some hydro-cortisone cream on it. Now, good old Grandma is on Facebook. Yes, my grandmother, mother, aunt, and mailman  father. It seems that everyone and their mother has a Facebook. And here, people, is where my list starts with shit that annoys me about my Facebook…

Everybody Has One:

Like I mentioned above, everybody has a Facebook. My old teacher from high school ‘that kicked me out of his Geometry class because I told him Fuck Off’ has one, and what do you know we are friends. Suck. My aunt and grandmother are both friends of mine on Facebook so when I wake up from a night of drinking to see that I embarrassingly did the ultimate no-no and updated my status while tipsy, my whole family is there to see my shame. Awesome.

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Quizzes and Games:

The games on Facebook are definitely one of the most annoying aspects of Facebook. Farmville? Mafia Wars? Are you effing kidding me? Like I really have the time to sit there and play a computer game, let alone one on Facebook. Furthermore, do you really think I give a shit if you forgot to water your fake crops or that you just hypothetically blew some mafia guys head off via your dumb computer game? Nope I don’t. So stop telling me and please, please stop inviting me to play with you.

I can’t forgot to mention the annoying people that feel is necessary to crowd up my ‘recent updates’ walls with results from their “quiz” they just took. So let me guess this straight.. ‘you felt the need to know what “Mafia Wife” you most resembled before you went to bed? And then proceeded to take a quiz on what kind of handgun you are most like? Really? Here is some free advice for those people: get off your computer and go read a fucking book or something because obviously Facebook is killing your brain cells.’

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The Photo Tagger

I have a Facebook account and usually upload certain memories of our vacations, outings, memories, and such. I don’t tag other people in said photos unless they asked to be tagged. Why is this so hard for everyone else to understand. No, I don’t want you to tag me in a photo that I catches me in a bad position or makes me look like I just got run over by a bus. No, I don’t want you to keep tagging me, even after I untagged myself – twice. If I am out for a night on the town with my girlfriends, and I have a drink in my hand and I am dancing like the dancing queen I am on a chair please do not tag me. Thanks. Some photos are better left not seen by my grandmother.

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The Person who updates their facebook on EVERYTHING:

And by everything I mean evvvverrryyything. Like how many centimeters you are, while you are giving birth. Like how you caught a horrible stomach bug and you and have been shitting yourself to death for the last 24 hours. Seriosuly, do you really think anybody really wants to know any of your way-to-personal information.. no. Some things are way too TMI for Facebook (or just plain unnecessary). Other offenders of this are those who post their relationship break-up step by step via their updates and those that post the traffic (dude, I watch the news and I know the traffic thanks).

While I am on the subject of the asses who post way to much on their profile, I am going to go ahead and say it: posting ultrasound photos of your baby on your facebook is creepy. Please, stop.

The constant bitching and whining:

As I realize this list is getting a bit long and I have done nothing about bitch about Facebook; I am going to bitch about those bitch… on Facebook. Now, I am not talking about someone who randomly posts a complain, whine, or bitch.. I am talking about the Facebook friend (whom you don’t really want to be friends with anyways) who constantly bitches and complains about bad their life is. Every. Single. Status. is wah, wah, wah, my life sucks.. wah, wah, wah, I suck at life with FML thrown in there. I get that sometimes people have bad days but really… updating your status every 5 minutes bitching and complaining is just obnoxious.

and lastly,

The Creeper:

Everybody has one. You know, the person that seems to constantly be on Facebook, commenting and liking everybody’s status updates and wall posts quicker than you click on the home button. Or the creeper that leaves a comment on a photo that you uploaded like 2 years ago (wtf are you looking that far back into my photos for? Creep)

I get that some people have no life and spend way to much time on Facebook. And that is completely OK with me.. just don’t be a creepster about it.

edited to add:

The “People You May Know” feature or “Suggest Friends” feature

I can’t believe I almost forgot about this one. 99.9% percent of the time I have no freaking idea who Facebook tells me I “may know”. Am I the only one? Or when I do see someone I know on the right hand corner of my Facebook screen; chances are I do know them and I have either a) ignored their friend request or b) in no way want to be their friend and am praying that that they don’t request me.

The suggest friends feature is another annoyance of mine. Like I really want to spend an extra minute of my life suggesting friends for someone else. Half of the people on my Facebook I don’t even want to be friends with but also don’t want to seem like the as*hole on the block either.

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**EDITED TO ADD ON SEPTEMBER 23, 2011**

The “I bitch about every Facebook change”:

You know the ones… who every single time facebook changes something (regardless if it is a big or small change) they continuously serial post about the new changes “suck” and that they want “their old fb back”… um. See above photo please.

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Do you ever have those weeks days that you are more easily aggravated than other days? Well I do and for some reason this has been especially true for me, especially dealing with people. For some unknown reason, I’ve  just been fed up with people. Yup. People in general actually. People in the supermarket, people in line at the RedBox kiosk, a waitress or waiter, a fellow driver, or an obnoxious Facebook friend …  Just freaking people. You are probably wondering why I’m so annoyed with people right? Well, let me give you some examples of the awesome people I have run into lately:

The supermarket: where do I even begin? Oh, I know!  How about the woman that nearly ran her cart into me…twice. Then there are the lovely cell phone talkers who seem to deem it necessary to talk or text on their cell phones DIRECTLY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE AISLE. or how about the 85 year old deli dude (bless his heart) who handed me pound of cheese in four, yes FOUR different bags each a 1/4 big (a pound of cheese took him about 15 minutes to slice. No JOKE. And of course I can’t forget the crazy coupon nightmare that just had to ring in about 20 of her items separately so she could save a total of 25 cents. If it would’ve saved me from wasting 45 minutes of my time I would’ve gladly given her a whole dollar – a 75 cent profit!

The RedBox Kiosk: every freaking time I am at the RedBox kiosk trying to rent a movie or two, I always have a gem get right in line behind me straight away. And of course, every time its that person that stands so close to you that they are practically in your back pocket. They stand there, clearly invading my personal space, and even have the nerve to give off a sigh or two if I take more than 2 minutes… Dude, first of all how about backing up a few feet so I don’t have you breathing down my neck. Secondly, how am I supposed to pick a good movie if you’re freakin rushing me?
I think RedBox should put out one of those “stand here until available” signs to guide people in line etiquette. #justsaying

Restaurants: this one is a two-parter – double the fun!
Part 1 – I have worked in the food service industry at a few different restaurants so I know how difficult it can be sometimes. Any job that deals with the public is shit. That said, what the @$#% do I have to do to get a glass of water? Seriously? I swear I asked our server the other night at least 8 times for a glass of water. At least. And this shit happens all the damn time. I just don’t understand. I could understand if I didn’t order it, but water is the first thing I order every. time.
And speaking of going out to eat… I am convinced that Tommy and I have ‘worst waiter ever’ curse. Pretty sure because it seems like whenever we go out, we just have the absolute worst waiter/waitress ever. You know the type: wrong order, is great at the dissapearing act etc…

The facebook friend you can’t delete because you will look like an ass: Now, I know I just bitched about Facebook the other day but I just had to clarify this: See, it isn’t the actual Facebook that annoys me, it is the people that use it! And I am sure you are saying to yourself “well, why not just unfriend them?” Come on, we all know it sometimes isn’t that easy. I am sure I am not the only one out there who has “friends” on the book that take annoying to a whole new level but they are the type of facebook friend that if you delete them, they will know and you will look like an ass. Whether it is a co-worker, childhood friend, or even a family memeber for petes sake — you just can’t give them the old defriend. So, again — not Facebook… people abusing facebook!

Are people in life getting more and more annoying? Or is it me…

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Chemical Confessions

I have been reading a lot of magazines lately (and not just my trashy gossip mags) and I feel like in every single health and fitness magazine I read there is an article on artificial sweetener and/or corn syrup/sugar. These articles got me thinking about my own diet and sweetener use. Even though I try and limit my sugar and corn syrup consumption, I am guilty of artificial sweetener use. On most days, I don’t eat too much “processed” food; however my downfall? Beverages. Without a doubt. oh and candy, I fricken love candy.

I will start my confessions with my morning beverage: coffee. I am a big coffee lover and drink it daily. Unfortunately, I sweeten in with the devil:

 

                                                                                                                                                             My morning cup of joe… In a soup bowl cuz thats how I roll.

I know. I know. Splenda is just a big bunch of chemicals that I are pumping through my body as I type this. But, I can’t help it. I have tried and tried to use truvia to sweeten my coffee but I just don’t like the way it makes my coffee taste. And starting out with a bad cup of coffee in the beginning of the day could quite possibly cause my whole day to be out of whack. And I just can’t have that.

On a more positive note, usually, for my other “sweetener” purposes I use Truvia:

 

 

Now, when I say usually I mean I use truvia for the following things: sweeten fruit (like blueberries and strawberries), sweeten up greek yogurt (it is just too tart for me), baking, and pretty much anything else that requires sugar. I try to limit my pure sugar consumption because once I get my paws on it – shit gets ugly really quick. This is especially true for candy like sweedish fish, gummy bears (Haribo of course) and sour patch kids. When I travel, I usually have a gigantic bag of penny candy – and I enjoy each and every minute of my sugar high.

My next confession? Drinks. I am huge flavored beverage drinker. I usually don’t drink diet soda, but do drink a ton of flavored waters and sports drinks:

                                                                                                 

Yea, so you can see I am pretty much pumping myself with artificial sweeteners all day long. The vitamin water zero says that it is “naturally sweetened” with Stevia, but I take that information with a grain of salt because I have heard other stories about my beloved vitamin water that I really don’t even want to type out; and therefore read. The Powerade Zero and Mio water flavoring is chock full of sucralose and other scary chemicals. Other regulars in my thirst quenching rotation is Propel Zero and Lifewater Zero.

So, needless to say, I am a self-proclaimed chemical lover. Am I ashamed? Nope. Because, hey it could be worse…

 

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I had actually completely forgotten about good ol’ myspace until an advertisement came across my screen. So, I decided to head on over to the ‘space and see if I could still login to my account. After a few failed attempts, I got in and holy flashback. My life was so different back then:

Life circa 2007:

– Myspace was just really getting started and I didn’t give Facebook the time of day back then. The only thing I used myspace for was to waste time.

– Tommy and I had just started dating

– I used to spend my weekends with my ‘old’ girlfriends. At the time, they were my best friends (and I thought they would always be) and we would hit the clubs and bars each and every Friday & Saturday night.

– I had no idea what a “tweet” was

– I was about 60 pounds heavier than I am now and the gym was the last place you would find me

Present day:

– Tommy and I are engaged to be married!

– I don’t do Myspace and use my Facebook to keep in touch with family and friends.

– I am no longer friends with the “group” of girls I once was — and it sometimes still stings.

– My ideal night out is a dinner date with my fiance..

– I am a regular at the gym and try to keep a healthy lifestyle – sometimes.

The throwback to myspace actually made me really appreciate my life right now… like a lot.

 

 

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